In the spirit of last week's post, here are my top ten things to say when there's a hole in your gondola and someone annoyingly wants to know why:
1. I THOUGHT that plank was loose.
2. Man! I hate termites!
3. I said “no firearms”, but NOOO, that guy didn’t listen!
4. Well, I guess that spot of dry-rot isn’t so dry anymore.
5. Wanna see the hole? Wanna see it? Here, step right up to the edge. Now look deep into that water-filled boat and...now wait (BOOT!), there you go. You got a fish-eye view!
6. This way we can see the bottom.
8. NEVER allow clog dancers on your boat.
9. What hole? I don't see any hole, what with all the water in the way. You're crazy!
10. Trust me – never piss off a Narwhal!
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